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The male teacock’s extravagant handles evolved to attract the attention of the drabber-colored teahen. The males with the largest, glossiest, and most brilliantly colored handles will attract a small harem of females. Males compete only by display, and will not engage in actual battle for fear of chipping. 

The downside to the spectacular display by the males is that lugging around such a weight of crockery makes them more vulnerable to predators, particularly the aquatic crockpotodile, the teacock’s chief predator. - Ursula Vernon

"It’s like in the great stories, the ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were. And sometimes you didn’t want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines, it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn’t. Because they were holding on to something… There’s some good in this world, and it’s worth fighting for.

(Source: riddlemetom)

lastofthetimeladies:

im-a-timelord-you-ass:

lastofthetimeladies:

lastofthetimeladies:

MY MOM JUST ASKED ME WHAT I WANT MY CAKE TO BE FOR MY SPIDER-MAN THEMED BIRTHDAY PARTY AND I TOLD HER I WANT IT TO BE IN THE SHAPE OF ANDREW GARFIELD’S BUTT AND SHE WAS LIKE “SEND ME SOME PHOTOS I’LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO” OH MY GOD

image

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

'Scuse me, but may I have a piece of that ass?

Do you know how many times I made that joke at my party

Do you

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